Target

Now that I can drive again, I've been anxious to run an errand with the kiddos. I've been really spoiled lately since Alan has been with us the few times we've been out. However, after the last several months, we're all ready to get back to normal. So, I made my list, checked the diaper bag twice and headed out. How did it go? See for yourself.

10 am - Park car. Nurse baby.

10:02 - Realize baby has very dirty diaper. Also realize you have no baby wipes. Send 4-year-old to dig through glove box for anything suitable. Change baby.

10:05 - Nurse baby. Clean up spit-up. Nurse baby. Clean up spit-up. Try to entertain bored 4-year-old.

10: 35 - Baby finally finished. Burp baby. Feel spit-up soak the back of your shirt. Bribe 4-year-old to wipe it off. Realize we have another dirty diaper. Decide to buy wipes in Target. Realize diaper is leaking on you and baby. Send 4-year-old back to glove box. Avoid eye contact as he nods his head in disapproval. Wonder if you're worthy to parent these children.

10:45 - Finally clean baby. Attempt to put baby in sling. Try not to pinch fat on legs (yours and hers). Finally get out of car.

10:50 - Get back in car after 4-year-old yells for help. Clean up the OJ running across the backseat.

11:00- Finally enter Target

11:10 -Get one week's worth of baby supplies. Notice cart is already half full. Begin to console wailing baby.

11:15 - Help 4-year-old choose toy to purchase with hard-earned chore money. Bounce crying baby. Decide the sling is worthless.

11:30 - Head to Food Dept. Fuss at 4-year-old for pitching a fit.

11:31 - Realize 4-year-old is not pitching a fit. He is crying b/c you ran over his foot with the cart. Decide you are definitely unworthy to parent these children.

11:35- Scan remainder of list. Decide nothing is that important. Head to check-out.

11:40 - Thank cashier profusely for loading the cart and offering to help us to the car. Try to discern if she's exceptionally nice or if you look exceptionally desperate.

11:50 - Try to detangle sleeping baby from sling. Get everyone in car seats.

12:00 - Decide you really miss your husband. Head home. Glance back at your babies and decide this is exactly what you want!

"I'm a mommy. What's your superpower?"